This month my own coach encouraged me to stop and think about the real value of rest and recuperation. In our goal-driven society, with all the demands and obligations and aspirations we have, rest and recuperation is vital, but it's also something that can be hard to really give into. Sometimes what's even harder, though, is giving in and then having to come back! Which is what I experienced on my one-week vacation in late July.
Now as I prepare to go to Mexico for a week, it's as if everything feels accelerated, as if stepping away from it all feels at once like the most impossible and the most important thing I can do for myself. With my own clients, I work hard to cultivate balance and to honor where the writer needs to be. But I also strive to be tough, to hold people accountable, and to keep myself and my writers beating to the rhythm of a fairly steady drum. But all of us reach burnout. All of us get to a place where the only solution is vacation, stepping outside of our day-to-day, allowing oureslves to s l o w d o w n . . .
Because it's August, the summeriest of the summer months, I want to take a moment to honor rest and recuperation. We all need it, and where creativity is concerned, stepping away from our lives can bring much needed perspective. Away from email, phone, blogs, and television, we can disengage. Whether or not you're vacationing this month, consider that next time you go out of town. Make it a goal to disengage, as completely as possible, from all the things you're plugged into. For those of you who already make this a priority, excellent; for those of you who don't, don't underestimate its value for even a second. It's when we're away from the things that distract us where we can allow ourselves to get in touch with our deepest sense of self.
Happy End of Summer!
---Brooke
RETURN TO WARNER COACHING HOMEPAGE
August 6, 2008
July 5, 2008
how to be free
Yesterday was Independence Day. Happy Fourth to all!
What it got me thinking about, though, was freedom. Because it's so easy to take freedom for granted, I feel like Independence Day is a good day to reflect on freedom, just like Thanksgiving is a good day to reflect on what we're thankful for.
This summer has been busier than any summer I can recall. It feels difficult to make time for the things I want to do. And even when I do have time, it seems even harder to slow time down enough to breathe and enjoy it all.
One of the themes of my coaching this past week has been about harnessing life and living the life we're all capable of living. And the connection to freedom doesn't escape me. How can we breathe into our bigness if we don't allow ourselves to be free---free from the voices that tell us we can't, free to believe we can manifest our own biggest dreams, free to live as large as we can possibly imagine.
I thought I'd leave my readers with a summer poem for July, and ask you all to reflect on what you'll do with your one wild and precious life.
“The Summer Day”
Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean–
The one who flung herself out of the grass,
The one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
Who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down—
Who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
Into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
How to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
Which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
With your one wild and precious life?
---Mary Oliver
Until next month,
Brooke
GO BACK TO THE WARNER COACHING HOMEPAGE
What it got me thinking about, though, was freedom. Because it's so easy to take freedom for granted, I feel like Independence Day is a good day to reflect on freedom, just like Thanksgiving is a good day to reflect on what we're thankful for.
This summer has been busier than any summer I can recall. It feels difficult to make time for the things I want to do. And even when I do have time, it seems even harder to slow time down enough to breathe and enjoy it all.
One of the themes of my coaching this past week has been about harnessing life and living the life we're all capable of living. And the connection to freedom doesn't escape me. How can we breathe into our bigness if we don't allow ourselves to be free---free from the voices that tell us we can't, free to believe we can manifest our own biggest dreams, free to live as large as we can possibly imagine.
I thought I'd leave my readers with a summer poem for July, and ask you all to reflect on what you'll do with your one wild and precious life.
“The Summer Day”
Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean–
The one who flung herself out of the grass,
The one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
Who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down—
Who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.
I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down
Into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,
How to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,
Which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
With your one wild and precious life?
---Mary Oliver
Until next month,
Brooke
GO BACK TO THE WARNER COACHING HOMEPAGE
June 15, 2008
how to make the most or the least of your writing this summer
Make the most:
•Set specific times to write. The days seem longer in the summertime, so there's ample opportunity to allocate time during your day to your writing. Consider two- to three-hour slots. Set up in a cafe, or in a window seat in your house so you don't feel so shut in. Allow yourself to be inspired by the weather rather than making a list of all the other things you'd rather be doing.
•Get up early. It seems easier to get up earlier when it's light by 6 am, so try writing in the morning. If you live with roommates or family and you're craving quiet time, morning can be a huge make-the-most opportunity. Hell, why not try getting up at 5 am? Set your coffee timer and gift yourself the morning.
•Take a writing retreat. This might sound impossible if you have kids to attend to, or if you feel broke. But consider the possibility of going away, even just for a weekend. You can book yourself a weekend in a secluded bed and breakfast, or consider checking out Craigslist listings and see if you might find a housesitting gig. It's amazing how effective a single weekend of writing can be in jumpstarting your motivation and enthusiasm.
•Make your summertime goals known. Yes, this is a common accountability structure, but you need to tell someone what you hope to accomplish this summer. Maybe you need to finish your book proposal. Maybe you want to write five short stories. Perhaps your goal is to write three chapters of your memoir. Whatever it is, tell someone. Ask them to follow up with you every few weeks for a progress report. It might feel scary, but it's scarier to think that come fall you might not be a single step further along in your project than you are now---right?
Make the least:
•Tell yourself you'll do it tomorrow! A sure way to make the least of your writing is to procrastinate or NOT have set writing days. If you're telling yourself that a vague "I'll do it when I have time" schedule is going to work for you, believe me, it won't. There are always a million better things to do---especially in the summer when you can spend time outside and there are extra little voices in your head beckoning you to step away from the computer. Ignore them! Set your times and stick to them, and then you can indulge your voices on your non-writing days all you want.
•Don't prioritize your writing. Here's a fact: There are more important things than your writing. Your relationships, your family, keeping your house clean, your day job. Yes, it all ranks higher on the priority list than this thing that's your hobby or your passion, I know. So it's easy to turn to everything else before you turn to your writing. Write out your priority list and see where your writing falls, and if it's lower than, say, cleaning the bathroom, ask yourself why that is and if there's any way to bump it up a bit this summer. Maybe with enough practice it will be up on the top tiers by fall.
•Assume responsibility for everything. A lot of us have a ton of things to manage over the summer, particularly those of us with kids out of school. The more involved you get in scheduling and assuming all responsibility, the more of a guarantee it is that September will be here and you'll have done very little toward making progress with your writing. Each of you will have to handle this particular hurdle your own way, but consider asking for help. Don't be a martyr. Don't assume that no one else can handle what needs to be done. If you set aside your two hours, tell your partner or children what you're doing and allow them to be allies in your goals rather than distractions from them.
•Convince yourself that summer equals rest. If you treat your writing as work or a burden or an obligation that's hanging over your shoulder, then of course you'll believe that you deserve a break! If this is true for you, try thinking about your writing differently. Reframe your relationship with your writing this summer and consider all the ways in which it brings you alive. It's easy to feel lazy in the summer, and to justify that. So think of your writing as something like exercise or eating healthy. It's easy to feel lathargic and out of it, and sometimes we just need to change our habits a little bit to realize how much our day-to-day doesn't actually have to feel that way.
So go for it! Make the most of it, and consider the ways your sabateurs might be encouraging you to make the least of it. Happy June. Just days until summer!
Until next time.
Brooke
RETURN TO WARNER COACHING HOMEPAGE
•Set specific times to write. The days seem longer in the summertime, so there's ample opportunity to allocate time during your day to your writing. Consider two- to three-hour slots. Set up in a cafe, or in a window seat in your house so you don't feel so shut in. Allow yourself to be inspired by the weather rather than making a list of all the other things you'd rather be doing.
•Get up early. It seems easier to get up earlier when it's light by 6 am, so try writing in the morning. If you live with roommates or family and you're craving quiet time, morning can be a huge make-the-most opportunity. Hell, why not try getting up at 5 am? Set your coffee timer and gift yourself the morning.
•Take a writing retreat. This might sound impossible if you have kids to attend to, or if you feel broke. But consider the possibility of going away, even just for a weekend. You can book yourself a weekend in a secluded bed and breakfast, or consider checking out Craigslist listings and see if you might find a housesitting gig. It's amazing how effective a single weekend of writing can be in jumpstarting your motivation and enthusiasm.
•Make your summertime goals known. Yes, this is a common accountability structure, but you need to tell someone what you hope to accomplish this summer. Maybe you need to finish your book proposal. Maybe you want to write five short stories. Perhaps your goal is to write three chapters of your memoir. Whatever it is, tell someone. Ask them to follow up with you every few weeks for a progress report. It might feel scary, but it's scarier to think that come fall you might not be a single step further along in your project than you are now---right?
Make the least:
•Tell yourself you'll do it tomorrow! A sure way to make the least of your writing is to procrastinate or NOT have set writing days. If you're telling yourself that a vague "I'll do it when I have time" schedule is going to work for you, believe me, it won't. There are always a million better things to do---especially in the summer when you can spend time outside and there are extra little voices in your head beckoning you to step away from the computer. Ignore them! Set your times and stick to them, and then you can indulge your voices on your non-writing days all you want.
•Don't prioritize your writing. Here's a fact: There are more important things than your writing. Your relationships, your family, keeping your house clean, your day job. Yes, it all ranks higher on the priority list than this thing that's your hobby or your passion, I know. So it's easy to turn to everything else before you turn to your writing. Write out your priority list and see where your writing falls, and if it's lower than, say, cleaning the bathroom, ask yourself why that is and if there's any way to bump it up a bit this summer. Maybe with enough practice it will be up on the top tiers by fall.
•Assume responsibility for everything. A lot of us have a ton of things to manage over the summer, particularly those of us with kids out of school. The more involved you get in scheduling and assuming all responsibility, the more of a guarantee it is that September will be here and you'll have done very little toward making progress with your writing. Each of you will have to handle this particular hurdle your own way, but consider asking for help. Don't be a martyr. Don't assume that no one else can handle what needs to be done. If you set aside your two hours, tell your partner or children what you're doing and allow them to be allies in your goals rather than distractions from them.
•Convince yourself that summer equals rest. If you treat your writing as work or a burden or an obligation that's hanging over your shoulder, then of course you'll believe that you deserve a break! If this is true for you, try thinking about your writing differently. Reframe your relationship with your writing this summer and consider all the ways in which it brings you alive. It's easy to feel lazy in the summer, and to justify that. So think of your writing as something like exercise or eating healthy. It's easy to feel lathargic and out of it, and sometimes we just need to change our habits a little bit to realize how much our day-to-day doesn't actually have to feel that way.
So go for it! Make the most of it, and consider the ways your sabateurs might be encouraging you to make the least of it. Happy June. Just days until summer!
Until next time.
Brooke
RETURN TO WARNER COACHING HOMEPAGE
May 10, 2008
who needs an author platform anyways?
This month I'd like to talk about what an author platform is, why it's important, and who needs it anyways. There's a hell of a lot of talk in the publishing industry these days about the importance of the Almighty Author Profile---the AAP.
The AAP is important, it's true, but I know how confusing it is for writers who have aspirations of getting their books published.
First of all, what is an author platform?
The answer is not clear-cut. If you're a memoirist writing a book about your childhood, your author platform might include your blog, your MySpace page, and evidence of some readership. If you're a first-time novelist, an author platform is actually surprisingly less important than you might think. If you're a life coach, your platform might include your network of other coaches or your affiliation with a larger coaching program you're involved with. If you're writing a book about Alzheimer's, part of your platform is going to involve reaching out to specialists and networks of people who work with people suffering from Alzheimer's.
The shorter more universal answer is that a platform is anything that shows your future publisher that you have the potential to reach a wide readership. That said, if you're writing a cookbook, there's no sense in detailing your connections to the martial arts community you've been involved with since you were a child. The AAP must be focused and concise, and if you're smart, it will detail things the publisher won't have thought of. For instance, I've worked with an Asian American memoirist who listed all of her contacts to Asian American magazines and community groups. I've signed writers who have successful blogs and a proven readership. Even if your contacts and networks are minimal, start putting together a list now. See what you have to get a gauge on what you might start doing to bolster your AAP.
So what should you be doing if you want to be known as a writer with a great platform?
1. Start a website: If you don't already have one, get one. There's really no way to understate the importance of a website. If it makes sense, you should be blogging, too. But at the bare minimum, get yourself a simple site that gives information about who you are and what you're writing, and that includes some sample writing, particularly if you're writing a novel or a memoir.
2. Start doing outreach: If you're writing nonfiction, particularly prescriptive self-help, start identifying your target readership and making contacts with those people and their organizations. If you're writing about addiction, for instance, start researching the groups online that are recommending addiction/self-help books. Figure out which organizations might support your book. I had an author who wrote a marathoning book and she contacted all the national marathon training groups to tell them about what she was writing. Certainly if you can get on people's radar, you're on your way to building your author platform.
3. Get published: It doesn't matter whether it's an op-ed or a feature piece---consider getting your work published. If your a poet or a fiction writer this is actually more important than if you're a nonfiction writer, but it's important for any aspiring writer. The more bylines you have, the greater your profile. End of story. If you can say you've been published, you have a leg up on the competition. Start small. Publish for free in the beginning if you have to. Start researching where stories or articles that are relevant to your book might get picked up. This is hard work, particularly if you're more focused on writing you're book than you are on building you're platform. But if you can manage to hold both things at the same time, this is a sure-fire way to get publishers' attention.
4. Contact your friends (or friends of friends) in high places: Yes, if you can guarantee a foreword or a blurb by a high-profile person that can actually tip the scale. So work your contacts, and be shameless if you have to. It's hard for writers, particularly those who prefer to be at their computers writing rather than engaging with the public, to understand that publishers love the authors who have the charisma to TV and radio and to be out there engaging with their readers. And it's not for everyone. And it doesn't mean you can't get published if you're not a social butterfly. It's just to say that it's no longer possible to be a successful author who refuses to give interviews or who lives in relative obscurity or who's too shy to ask their friends who they know, and hey, for that matter, if they'll buy your book once it's published.
5. Consider public speaking: Nothing builds the AAP quite like public speaking. Again, it's not for everyone, and if you're a novelist this doesn't necessarily make sense. But once you're published, you might start getting calls to talk to groups of aspiring authors, and then that does absolutely make sense. But if you're a specialist, and you're writing a book about being bipolar or about Latino solidarity or about the generation gap or about the struggle to balance motherhood and career, then you need to find out groups you can speak to. Oftentimes it's the book deal that generates the speaking gigs, but if you can figure out ways into speaking engagements, this is something that publishers love. Why? Because it shows a demonstrated and preexisting audience. So consider what you're writing and what you have to say and whether you might be able to break into the speaking scene and add another notch on the AAP.
That's it for this month. Super practical advice stemming from my clients' questions and confusion. The author platform is basically a creation of modern-day publishing, but it's one you can't ignore. If you want to be published, you have to be dazzling. Some of you will be able to do that with your writing alone, but unfortunately those writers are few and far between. So start thinking about the big picture, and consider getting started with at least one of the ideas I've laid out here. And don't stress. Even one of these things counts as a solid start. The good thing about book publishing is it will always be there, so those of you who have the foresight to build your platform slowly and steadily are going to benefit in the longrun.
---Brooke
Return to the Warner Coaching homepage.
April 2, 2008
spring cleaning: a writer's ritual
This month's topic is all about Spring Cleaning Your Writing. For those of you who don't think you need to spring clean your writing life, consider how good actual spring cleaning makes you feel. This year I had a very profound experience in getting rid of junk. About two weeks ago, within days of each other, I unloaded two carloads of books I've been hauling around with me over the years since college, made a trip to the electronic recycling center and even rid myself of a working computer, and cut off six-plus inches of hair. It wasn't intentional doing all this stuff at the same time, but the results were dramatic. I felt as if I'd lost fifteen pounds. I felt lighter, newer, and freer. Sound dramatic? I assure you it's not. Spring cleaning is cleansing, which is why every writer needs to incorporate it as a spring ritual.
Spring cleaning, as we're approaching it in our workshop, will be a metaphor, a goal, and an intention. It can be actual spring cleaning, and should be, especially if you're writing in a cluttered office space---or worse, a nook in the corner of one of your bedrooms or living room. It can also be spring cleaning of your creative space, a washing out of old ideas that are weighing you down, or which are simply not serving you. We all hold onto things, but we oftentimes don't understand why. I was growing out my hair, but for what purpose? It was nice in the beginning, when it was still healthy, but after a certain point I was growing out my hair because I was attached to the idea of having long hair. Once I chopped it off, I had to ask myself why I waited as long as I did. The same is true in writing, only finding out the things you're holding onto can require a little more inquiry.
Even if you can't attend the workshop, I urge you to do one spring cleany thing thing this month as it pertains to your writing. Clean your desk or office space. Get rid of books you haven't opened in more than three years (and which don't hold significant sentimental value, of course). Or journal on some or all of the following questions:
1. What do I love about being a writer?
2. Which of these things are about what brings my soul alive?
3. What kinds of risks do I take in my writing?
4. What would it mean to truly risk myself in my writing?
5. What one thing am I unwilling to let go of when it comes to my writing?
6. If I had to let go of this one thing, what would happen?
7. How does that actually make you feel?
These questions could be part of your daily pages or personal journaling. I encourage it as a way of digging deeper into the question of what maybe needs to be cleaned and cleared out versus the places where you know you have a tendency to be cluttered and stuck. Take a chance here and see what reveals itself. Maybe it will be so effective that you'll feel compelled to ritualize the experience for yourself.
---Brooke
Spring cleaning, as we're approaching it in our workshop, will be a metaphor, a goal, and an intention. It can be actual spring cleaning, and should be, especially if you're writing in a cluttered office space---or worse, a nook in the corner of one of your bedrooms or living room. It can also be spring cleaning of your creative space, a washing out of old ideas that are weighing you down, or which are simply not serving you. We all hold onto things, but we oftentimes don't understand why. I was growing out my hair, but for what purpose? It was nice in the beginning, when it was still healthy, but after a certain point I was growing out my hair because I was attached to the idea of having long hair. Once I chopped it off, I had to ask myself why I waited as long as I did. The same is true in writing, only finding out the things you're holding onto can require a little more inquiry.
Even if you can't attend the workshop, I urge you to do one spring cleany thing thing this month as it pertains to your writing. Clean your desk or office space. Get rid of books you haven't opened in more than three years (and which don't hold significant sentimental value, of course). Or journal on some or all of the following questions:
1. What do I love about being a writer?
2. Which of these things are about what brings my soul alive?
3. What kinds of risks do I take in my writing?
4. What would it mean to truly risk myself in my writing?
5. What one thing am I unwilling to let go of when it comes to my writing?
6. If I had to let go of this one thing, what would happen?
7. How does that actually make you feel?
These questions could be part of your daily pages or personal journaling. I encourage it as a way of digging deeper into the question of what maybe needs to be cleaned and cleared out versus the places where you know you have a tendency to be cluttered and stuck. Take a chance here and see what reveals itself. Maybe it will be so effective that you'll feel compelled to ritualize the experience for yourself.
---Brooke
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